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Where to be and what to watch...

Monday, Aug. 7

Would you like to “create an immediate impact on your
multichannel performance?” Of course you would! So hop over to
eTail 2006 in always sunny Philadelphia, as
the online commerce confab goes down at the Downtown Marriott.
“Action-oriented insight” is provided by Jay Herratti, senior VP of strategic planning, at
Barry Diller’s InterActive Corp. As e-commerce execs swarm Philly, some
creepy critters do the same on Fox. Swarms 2
offers “mounds of slithering serpents to hordes of insatiable
locusts,” and enough cockroaches to make Joe’s Apartment look like Mr. Clean’s
crib. The show debuts at 8 p.m. ET. Speaking of creepy-crawly premieres,
Gene Simmons Family Jewels, featuring the
KISS tongue-wagger and his erotic-film star
partner Shannon Tweed, debuts on A&E at

Tuesday, Aug. 8

The NFL on CBS
does Media Day at National Football League headquarters in New York. CBS News
President Sean McManus heads up the suit
brigade, while a jock squad that includes Phil
, Dan Marino and
Boomer Esiaison prepares to talk about prevent
defenses, West Coast offenses and safety blitzes. And a hearty congrats to
Wolf Blitzer and CNN’s The Situation
, which turns 1 today. Hopefully, the vibe is similarly warm and
fuzzy at Cablevision and News Corp., both of which announce second-quarter

Wednesday, Aug. 9

Earnings madness continues as Disney
and Viacom share Q2 numbers. Will
Bob Iger keep the Mouse flying like Dumbo?
Will MTV Networks’ ad numbers rebound?
Will Viacom chief Tom Freston stand by his
bold earnings projections? We’ll soon find out. And do you find yourself
in the market for a little spectrum? The likes of DirecTV, EchoStar,
Liberty and Verizon start the bidding for spectrum at the
FCC, paving the way for advanced
wireless-video services. A frontrunner in the iPod-video revolution,
Desperate Housewives
hits New York; a PC game based on the show is on display at Media
Oasis in midtown Manhattan.

Thursday, Aug. 10

The Mid-Atlantic chapter of the National
Association for Multi-Ethnicity in Communications
is getting
together at the Hyatt Inner Harbor in Baltimore. “Growth and Stability
in an Ever-Changing Cable and Telecommunications Environment” is the
theme, and Michael Ortman, VP of programming
for Comcast Eastern Division, is the speaker.
Out in Los Angeles, there’s a screening for The
Ron Clark Story
at IPG Emerging Media Lab, with Matthew
as a teacher in a rough school who truly cares—because
there haven’t been nearly enough movies about teachers in rough schools
who truly care. And if you truly care about Making the
Band 3
, tune in for the season finale at 8 p.m. on MTV. Diddy’s latest ensemble Danity Kane—that would be Aubrey, Aundrea, Dawn,
Shannon and Wanita—try to coexist.

Friday, Aug. 11

Only 920 days until those analog TVs go dark! The
National Telecommunications and Information Administration
offers an
overview of the Converter Box Coupon Program
at the NOAA Auditorium in Silver Spring, Md.
And there’s nothing quite like Sin City in August, as the
Red Rock Chapter of the Society of
Cable Telecommunications Engineers
holds its Vendor Day at the Texas Station Hotel in North Las
Vegas. Speaking of not being able to stand the heat, do you enjoy watching 11-
year-olds buckle under extreme pressure? Then check out the
Little League World Series on
ESPN at 7 p.m. First round of Cracker Jacks
are on us!