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This Show's a Crime

It's Fox's Cops, only not as good and with hasbeens and/or b-list celeb-like folks posing as police. I'm surprised Fox didn't think of it first, though maybe it did and condluded it was a bad idea.

Armed & Famous aired Thursday night on CBS, a reality concept that TV was probably not crying out for.

From "sand and sun to arresting losers," explained the annoying theme song in a Gilligan's Island-like expository opening that showed the "stars" being plucked from their Hollywood environs and suited up for the streets of Muncie.

If this show's ratings don't dive from its first-half hour of sampling to the second half-hour, when I bet viewers  flee like a shoplifter from one of Muncie's finest, I'll be as stunned as a tasered perp.

Eric Estrada, an actor who used to play a cop, is now an actor playing a cop, though he seems to think he is the real thing. He has that Geraldo-like macho thing going, but it doens't take him that far.

I watched for the first half hour or so and was stupifyingly bored. I would rather see the Cops cops, who are pros.

I did learn that LaToya Jackson is afraid of cats, has a nose that appears to be folliwng brother Michael's toward the plastic surgery Hall of Infamy, but I could have lived until I drew my last breath without knowing either of those things and been completely content.

Finally, at least for me, there was the moment, accompanied by kazoo music, when Estrada was asked by a passerby to sign her "boob," which appeared to be a prosthetic one used by women who have had mastectomies.

Need I say more? *

*OK, yes. I just switched back and saw the bit about LaToya at the cat therapist. Who is scoring this show? The music was the worst I have ever heard, a bouncy cartoonish tune that was ridiculous.

By John Eggerton.